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8/13/07
Top Five Summer Tour Moments
Can you believe it? I saw my first “back to school” commercial the other day. Yup. Been out of school for years now and somehow the ol’ back-to-school ads still make my heart sink into my stomach as they ring the death knoll of summer. Okay, so it’s not quite over yet, but flip-flops and tank tops have been relegated to the bargain bin at the back of the store while all the glittery new stuff for Fall has taken over all the space in the display window. (Not that I really mind. I love saving money on flip-flops and tank tops.)
And as summer winds to a close, so do the summer tours and festivals. Y’know, those sun-drenched musical events where country fans flock from miles around to party in the parking lot before their favorite artist hits the stage. You can still smell the intoxicating aroma of steaks being grilled to perfection out of the trunk of a ’72 Chevelle by some big shirtless guy. – Or is that the shirtless guy I smell? Regardless, summer tours are all about, fun, sun, and pass me another beer. So before the tours wrap up completely, I thought it would be a good time to look back and reflect on some of my favorite on-stage moments from the summer of 2007. Here are my top-five in descending order…
Number Five – Pest Control
 Brad Paisley’s Bonfires and Amplifiers Tour concert in Moline, IL brought on the first prank of the summer. Brad’s opening acts Taylor Swift (aka: Taylor Tick), Kellie Pickler (aka: Kellie Tickler) and Jack Ingram (aka: The Exterminator) teamed to prank Brad first. During the performance of Brad’s
hit single, 'Ticks,' both Taylor and Kellie joined him on stage in tick costumes – soon Jack Ingram broke up the tick attack, wearing a 'Jack's Pest Control' costume. Brad is a notorious prankster, so it was just a matter of time before he would
give it back.
Number Four – Chicken Pickin’
 When Brad sang Dixieland Delight at Kellie's hometown concert in Charlotte, NC, Kellie walked on stage dressed as a farm girl and carrying chickens. She brought over not one, not two, or three, but six chickens up on stage laying them at his feet. The fans loved it and came as a complete surprise. Since Kellie, Taylor Swift, and Jack Ingram pulled the first prank of the tour (Pest Control) everyone thought Brad would pull the next one.
While Kellie was on stage, Taylor watched from the mosh pit with the fans. She had put on a brown wig and an ugly set of ‘Billy Bob’ fake teeth and gone down to the front row to cheer for Kellie during the prank. She was one of the people Kellie reached down and touched during the prank.
Brad’s reaction? “Just so you know, that’s not part of the show,” he told the crowd. “Neither is Kellie anymore.” Laugh.
Number Three – You Be The Judge
Then, Brad’s long awaited retaliation finally came. In front of a sold-out crowd in Camden, NJ, Brad ran a new show intro for Kellie on the big screens. The intro featured doctored photos and a plastic surgeon’s take on the question everyone wants to know about Kellie. The segment was called “You Be The Judge” and let the crowd of over 15,000 reach their own conclusion about the controversial subject of Kellie’s much debated assets.
Kellie quickly retaliated by coming on stage during Brad’s acoustic set, dressed in a trench coat. She opened the coat, flashed Brad and said, “You be the judge.” To which Brad replied, “In my line of work, there are definitely….perks.”
Number Two – Beyonce Takes a Great Fall
As some of you may have heard, country faves Sugarland will be performing with Beyonce Knowles at an upcoming television event. The specifics haven’t been nailed down but speculation points to the Billboard Awards in December for the collaboration to take place. Although Beyonce’s been portrayed by the media as a demanding diva, Jennifer Nettles and Kristian Bush have nothing to worry about. When it comes to performing, Beyonce is a consummate professional.
At her Orlando, FL, she songstress tripped and fell head-first down 12 steps. She recovered, never missing a beat, and kept singing and dancing as though nothing
was wrong.
Number One – Crotch Grab
 At the close of his set at the Cajundome in July, Tim McGraw was walking between the barricade and the stage to greet fans when a woman reached up and grabbed his crotch.
Faith Hill, who performed with hubby Tim on the Soul2Soul tour stop, berated the woman from the stage, calling her actions disrespectful. "Someone needs to teach you some class, my friend. You don't go grabbin' somebody else's -- somebody's husband's balls, you understand me? That's very disrespectful.”
Clips of Faith singling out the woman were posted on various Web sites, including YouTube and TMZ and within an hour, the video had made it around the world. Fans supported Faith’s decision to confront the woman and totally sided with her for defending her man. …Maybe the woman should have reached out and grabbed Faith. It’s clear she’s the one who has the balls in the family.
Have any good summer concert moments to share? Drop me a line. The best story gets a shout out in my next column. Until then remember, ‘it’s not what they say about you, it’s what they whisper.’
~Goldie
Goldie James works for CMT
Canada where she occasionally gets to hang out with today’s hottest
country stars. She splits her time between Toronto and Los Angeles
where she enjoys photography, writing and hunting for vintage cowboy boots.
Goldie@CountryStarsOnline.com
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